WALKING ALONG THE ROAD

Hey, readers, yeah, you guys. How big is the difference of our life?

To me, difference is an unlimited boundaries existed between all of us. Even how much I want to end up with happiness, but still I would find myself crying at every corner of my life, begging for something that I cant have like opportunity to study in higher education, or having someone by my side who doesn’t count any flaws on me to be together with or even my own parent.

Parents ,that is something that I couldn’t have now and ever. I have successfully ended my diploma a few weeks ago and I decided to deny my attendance on convocation day, many of my friends asks the sole reason for me to do so. My answer was financial failure to attend a Rm380 ceremony and so was for other reasons. But I did come to celebrate my friends, its like our last reunion together but without me wearing the robe. That day was a great day and also the most painful day of my life. I wasn’t that great in my CGPA and hell no I didn’t give a Sh*t about those and I ask myself why don’t I care and why don’t I put my highest effort in it. Finally I remembered, I have lost those “Positive Motivational Vitamin” long time ago at the day I receive my School Certificate. I took my PMR result with my mom and without my dad, I took my SPM result without my mom and neither my dad. And this diploma wouldn’t make me feel any sense of happiness as it is just a piece of paper that cost 42,000.00 Ringgit Malaysia.

My experience made me realize that I only have myself and never to include others in any happy moments and sad moments. Later that evening (convocation day) I ended up going back to my workplace as it turns out that I did mistakes that costs error to my work and also my boss. I was mocked. While my friends was out and having their celebrations, I was crooked up and left alone in the life dumpster. Hahahah. This post is now published with my private info in it! Again , I don’t give a Sh*t.

Well, I was going the talk about BOUNDARIES.

BOUNDARIES is the wall of our PERCEPTIONS and PERCEPTIONS are FABRICATED from our own life. We suffer and We Resisted either in a good way or in a bad way to every life obstacles. 

To every action we made, is the response that we produce by our experience resisting. 

Example: Whenever I see and observe each person’s life, I was too afraid that I would compare it with my own and I decided to play dumb so that I wont feel regrets to my past lifetime.

LOVER?

I will turn down every chances I had to find someone special and new in my life. Some people will say that I should try my best in winning her heart, should I? If I don’t, I will never win. But, do winning someone’s heart relied on me only? Sooner and later, I knew that I am not the kind of guy who would build an overnight palace just to win some princess’s heart, I am the guy who would get a construction contract first before building any size of palace for her. Every relationship that I have turned down is not a failure, it is a lesson that I should be better than her so that she would also try her best and appreciate this War of Love. Hahahahaha, I cant believe how important a woman can be in someone’s life, but, this is the output when it comes to be all alone for each second of my life. All I gotta do is be patience and wait for some woman who is crazy enough to fall for me as a stupid and penniless guy. It is hard to hand over our trust and love to someone special, cause we would do everything to make them happy.

I gotta admit that I do envy some guys that have much more. Nevertheless, I should also be thankful for I am not in the worst wolf pit. There are many people out there have no possession and also food or drinks.

Too much complaining is what I am doing right now. Never felt this stressed before. But I will keep my smile everyday. I suck at my job and I have giving up to move on, for I shall not quit and I will suffer. 

Thousands of drops per second,

Laid myself on the road
With the suffered mind and thoughts,
I have wet myself with painful breaths.

*I am trying to be poetic and it sounded so wrong. hahah

We all have our own problems, we just need to let it out. If you got someone to tell it to and you should have them as listener(s). for me, I have this blog and please dont be Judge. cause i hate courts

TGI FRIDAY - MY KIND OF PLACE ;)

Heyya, Its me again. Thanks for reading my blog even though the content does not satisfyingly compact. I am writing this post in my office on Saturday, yes, it is Saturday and it is also Deepavali. So, Happy Deepavali Day to all of my Indian friends, may you all enjoy the day with your beloved and love each other like there is no end in loving all of the things around you.

I am writing this post during my lunch break, how can there be any break when I am doing my Overtime with myself. Seriously, there is no one around here, Just me and my Blog. So, this will be a short post just to share my experiences with you guys. Yesterday I found a Cafe or I would like to say Warung around Bandar Baru Bangi, and the warung is a bit isolated with no one around but the food was


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Green Pit Stop Cafe

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I had a really great end of the week with couple of my friend and also my work colleague.

The Scenery was great and the warm welcoming kind of treatment really made me fell relief from work stress. Hahahaha, But still, here I am, writing for my blog from my office.

There is a small board for the menu, the chicken rise smells goooood, but i ordered bihun sup , I was craving for some hot soup!

There is also a Piano, Although its not quite functional, it is a great experience for me to touch a piano. hahahaha, I never touch such instrument before

We sit at this table while waiting for the night to come, I like garden and I am surely would love to eat in it.

 There is makcik nani playing her lullabies.

There is my Bihun soup with cendol entah sape yang order. It was Great, It was Cheap, It was Hotttt, It was Oxygen Surrounding us without any CO2. hahahaha

FRESH GRADS DILEMMA, Are You Having The Same Problem Like Me?

Tak sangka, dah 4 tahun berlalu. dah 21 tahun bernyawa, tapi masih tak sempurna. with all of the never ending life mistakes. Manusia tak sempurna doe.

Now, I am a 21 Years Old Dude/Male/Man dengan segala tanggungjawab dan kebimbangan di pikul kehulu kehilir. What is life going to offer next? Sebagai seorang rakyat Malaysia GEN-Y, kita dah banyak didedahkan dengan apa yang our elders did to our beloved country, oleh itu, nilai patriotisma dah menghilang dan mula melusuh dalam diri anak melayu. WHY?

Every problem, Ade Solution. Itu lah D U N I A....Itu lah H I D U P

As a muslim, I do believe in one thing. The future version of me is different than the current version of myself. I do believe in becoming someone new requires a few changes is our lifestyle. Kenapa Allah bagi kita dugaan, Mungkin sang pencipta tak sayangkan ciptaan Nya?? Bende ni takkan terlintas if kita paham Asma Ul Husna. Why? Sebab Allah maha mengetahui segala galanya, But , dye takkan membenci hamba Nya sesuka Hati.Selagi pintu taubat terbuka, TADAHLAH tangan kau walau perangai dah same level ngan setan. Aku pon same. Solat Taubat boleh buat banyak kali, Unlimited 

Let say, aku nak jadi seorang Engineer yang berpengaruh kat Malaysia. Yes I can, I can by giving my full potential and consistency in every working aspect. BUT, adakah dengan attitude aku di hari ni aku akan menjadi pengaruh yang baik untuk orang di sekeliling aku. Thats why, Human changes, aku harus berubah.

REZEKI dan MUSIBAH, they both give a human side effects, Physical and Mental Changes. Dua benda ni kita akan selalu jumpa dalam liku kehidupan kita. SO that kita paham, not everything is easy and tak semua benda yang kita nak mampu dicapai tanpa menadah tangan kat atas sejadah. Takyah nak acah hipster, abeskan masa dengan bende2 yang dilarang Allah. Dari kecil kebanyakan dari kita hidup dalam keselesaan, ada yang di luar sana nak makan 1 kali sehari pon lom tentu dapat. Why not manfaat kan masa,? kan? xsusah pon nak jadi kan diri kau bermanfaat untuk mak ayah dan negara.

Okay, enough membebel.

I'm here to give a statement for my past mistakes which includes my failure in future career goals planning.

Okay3....

At my last semester in GMi doing my final year project which is a Water Treatment Plant. Ada kekadang, my friends would ask same questions in different version. the question would be like,

"Hey, arep, kau nak further ke nak keje?"
"Wey rep, kau nak apply mane?"
"Areppann, kau nk furhter IPTA or IPTS"

And my answer would be like

"Aku study dlu kot, biase la, ekonomi skrang xberapa nak kukuh, keje susah sket kot, minyak lak turun harga."


WELLLLL, Im not expecting to end up today in Happiness, walaupun aku punya jalan nak sampai kesini penuh dengan dugaan dan tangisan. sekejap bertaubat, sekejap lupakan Allah.
Sememangnya rezeki manusia tidak didedahkan, tapi kita kena berusaha untuk mencapai apa yang kita nak, kan??? kalau tak berusaha, how can we become berjaya or kayaaaa...chhing chingg...ahahhahahah.

Aku tidak pernah terjangka, yang aku tidak akan mencapai apa yang aku nak untuk further studies di IPTA, instead aku end up browsing for work opportunities. Its not a bad thing, aku then end up dengan determination to build up my skills and hoping to survive domestic economical issues in staying alive. it s all about spending and saving at the same time. A basic salary for any diploma fresh grads ranging from 1000 to 2000. sape yang dapat lebih tu kira Alhamdulillah la.

Aku baru 2 kali gi interview and it is exhausting to offer myself to the gigantic companies. The payments is sufficiently enough. But , kena amalakan sikap menyimpan. kalau tak menyimpan harini, macam mana nak bina empayar keluarga di masa hadapan. kan?

Apa yang aku patut buat awal2 dulu are,

1. Ambil MUET sebelum abesnya final year dekat kolej, so that aku leyh prepare untuk September degree intakes.

2. Simpan duit skit2 di tahun akhir di kolej, untuk bersedia for any system failure such as tak dapat offer further lansung. Maybe leh guna untuk perbelanjaan gi interview.

3. Build up my own flowchart, financially and academically. Flowchart penting, untuk tahu ke mana arah nak gi lepas ni and what to do if that point of directions turn to 'NO'.

Being a man need responsibilities and reliability. No time to think about anything that involving female companion.

Bersambung........................